Open Mouth, Insert Foot

I've been putting my foot in my mouth a lot recently.
I blame it on fatigue from my trip.

(image from http://toonclips.com)

Just in the past week, here are a couple of examples:

Example #1:

My father-in-law kindly let me drive his SUV while we were visiting. After a few days I thought the doors were sticking a little so I helpfully mentioned it.

Me: (watching dad struggle with the door) Yeah, I noticed that door has been sticking lately.
Dad: (muscling the door open) Me too. It loks like one of your kids spilled an entire bottle of Coke on it.
Me: Ummm...
Dad: Yeah, the doors never stuck until you started driving this thing.
Me: (unable to speak around the foot) Mmmffff.

Example #2:

On the flight home, the kids were really starting to bug me by the third leg of the trip.

Okay, they were bugging me at the beginning of the trip, but after two layovers and seven cumulative hours in-flight, I was hiding my irritation much less successfully.

I was waiting oustide the tiny bathroom for about the millionth time while the twins used the facilities. (There's nothing more fascinating to a four-year-old than an airplane toilet.) A nice lady who had been sitting near me was also waiting.

Nice Lady: You have five children?
Me: Yes. Unfortunately.
Nice Lady: I wish I had children.
Me: Ummm...
Nice Lady: Yeah, I'm past forty now and I'm afraid I won't ever have any now.
Me: (horrified at myself, completely unable to speak around the foot) MMMFFFFF!


Hopefully after a little rest, I'll learn to choose my words more carefully.....